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Attachment can be defined as a deep and enduring emotional bond between two people in which each seeks closeness and feels more secure when in the presence of the attachment figure.
Attachment theory focuses on relationships and bonds between people, including those between a parent and child and between romantic partners. A human being’s first attachment is often established during infancy with the primary caregiver; however, it must be noted that attachment is not unique to infant-caregiver relationships, but may also be present in other forms of social relationships.
The attachment style is developed at the start of life, and once established, it is a style that stays with you and manifests itself today in how you engage in intimate relationships and how you raise your children.
The concept entails one's trust in the attachment figure's availability for use as a secure base from which one can freely explore the world when not in difficulty, as well as a safe haven from which one can seek support, protection, and comfort while in distress.
Two researchers, John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth discovered that the manner in which infants' needs are addressed by their parents has a substantial impact on their "attachment strategy" throughout their lives. They discovered these attachment patterns by studying children's reactions when their parents left and returned to the room.
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These reaction styles influence the attachment style learned/developed in childhood and have an impact on all adult relationships.
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| SECURE ATTACHMENT |
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People with a secure attachment style are comfortable in intimate relationships and tend to be dependent on others for support, have a positive image of themselves, and have positive expectations from others.
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| ANXIOUS – RESISTANT ATTACHMENT |
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Anxious attachment types are often nervous and stressed about their relationships. They consider themselves as not understood by others, lack confidence, and feel worried about the fact that others abandon them or do not really like them. They need constant reassurance and affection from their partner. They have trouble being
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alone or single. They’ll often succumb to unhealthy or abusive relationships. They have trouble trusting people, even if they’re close to them. Their behaviour can be irrational, sporadic, and overly emotional and they complain that every one of the opposite sex is cold and heartless.
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| AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT |
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Avoidant attachment types are extremely independent, self-directed, and often uncomfortable with intimacy. They find it difficult to rely on others and feel worried when others become too intimate with them. They regularly complain about feeling “crowded” or “suffocated” when people try to get close to them. In every relationship, they always have an exit strategy. They often construct their lifestyle in such a way to avoid commitment or too much intimate contact.
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| ANXIOUS-AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT |
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anxious-avoidant attachment types (also known as the “fearful type”) bring together the worst of both worlds, anxious-avoidant attachment is not only afraid of intimacy and commitment, but they distrust and lash out emotionally at anyone who tries to get close to them. anxious-avoidant attachment often spends much of their time alone and miserable, or in abusive or dysfunctional relationships.
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